I'm glad scripture says in Romans 10:9-10 that we only need to declare/confess with our mouth and believe in our heart that God raised Jesus from the dead to be saved. If it had involved a relationship like I have with Him now, I'd have been up a creek without a paddle. Many who have been "saved" (in other words, they have decided to believe by faith that Jesus Christ is indeed the very Son of God, and that His death on the cross and resurrection that followed paid the sin debt of death for them) would say that making that decision is the same as having a relationship with Jesus. While it does, in fact, introduce you to Jesus, and open the door for relationship, you don't automatically just "know" your Savior in all His glory. That would be like jumping from being introduced to the person who will be your spouse, to being married with a family a few seconds later. No relationship works like that. Jesus is no different.
Maybe this disagrees with your theology some, but hang with me. I really believe that we will end up in the same place if you will continue with me here. If you're one of those that has tried to have a relationship with Jesus, or you're just wondering what one looks like, read on too.
The absolute first step in having any relationship, as described above, is being introduced to the person with whom you desire relationship. This happens at the point in your life where you make the decision to follow Jesus by confessing that decision with your mouth, and believing in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead. At that decision crossroads, you change your eternal destination to heaven in the presence of God, forever and ever and ever (per Romans 10:9-10 listed above). But what about the relationship that follows? Let's look.
The Bible speaks primarily in the Old Testament of God audibly speaking to mankind. He used judges and prophets to do this most of the time. It normally wasn't to everyone who said they believed in God. Let me bring you some comfort right now and know that in my relationship with Jesus, I have never audibly heard His voice. You do not need to worry that someone will put you on an episode of Dr. Phil because you are hearing voices inside or outside your head. This is not some spiritually induced schizophrenia.
Growing up in the church, as I did, I used to believe that a relationship with Jesus was dedicated on what I did to instigate it, or to keep it going once it started. The things I thought I had to do was, of course, go to church, serve others, worship, read my Bible, etc. My list of things was probably no different than yours in most ways. I heard the scripture quoted many times, which is true, "come near to God and He will come near to you." (James 4:8) The only things that I could think of to draw near to God were the things in my list. I determined to get busy doing what I thought God would be doing or would want me to do, and surely He would then come near to me. I was wrong.
It wasn't until my life fell apart in 2011 and God started putting me back together again in 2012, that I realized what a relationship with Jesus/God really meant. What does it look like? Not much different than any of m other relationships. Let me explain.
I remember being in the altar in early 2012 and I was extremely broken. I was pouring out my heart to God and asking Him what was going to happen to me. I'd made some terrible choices, gotten involved in sin, and was reaping the benefits of my stupidity. Then in an altar in Texas, not audibly, yet clear as day, I heard the voice of God. It was more of a thought than anything. I knew the thought wasn't mine, though, because it wasn't saying anything to myself that I believed to be either true or possible. God only said, "Let me love you." Here I was crying and blubbering and trying to give Him a list of all the reasons why that couldn't happen. After all, because of what I had done, I viewed myself as unloveable. But love me He did and does.
I have an app on my iPhone called the Bible App. It posts a "Verse of the Day" each night at midnight. I have no way to properly explain it, but I chose to read those verses almost every day, and almost every day each one seemed as though God was speaking directly into my heart. Sometimes, it even got almost to the eerie point because the verse would be so on target. Those verses still say something to me most of the time. I have come to believe that it is simply because I make myself available to hear what God has to say. I tune out the noise of my day, and allow God to speak. There's no magical time of day to do it. Actually, I enjoy keeping the conversation going throughout the whole day.
See, here's the thing. All my lists of things that I thought I needed to do to draw near to God were actually things I was supposed to do because I had already drawn near to God. The list was supposed to be a result of my relationship, not the relationship itself. The lists, the details, the commandments, the rituals, were never intended to be my relationship with God. Yet, I had made them such. But what I've found is that God, the Creator of the universe, desires to sit down and talk with me all the time--daily. The biggest change in my prayer life if that I'm still and quiet long enough for God to talk back. Before, my prayers were my lists to God in response to the lists of things I brought to Him through my actions. It was a very warped way to have a conversation. Now, it's not like that at all.
Through reading those verses, I've learned more of the character of God. I've learned to discern His voice among all the other thoughts in my head. On top of that, I've seen the things He's told me revealed in my life. If not for revelation, I might consider contacting my straight jacket tailor and setting up a fitting. Where at first, most of His communication to me was through the Bible, now it's as much in my thoughts as it is reading scripture. Sometimes He even speaks to me through others who are also Christians and I recognize His voice in their words.
There is indeed a relationship to be had. It is God's wish for all mankind. But now do you see the difference I was speaking about in the first couple of paragraphs? Our confession and belief changes the eternal destination, but it's the relationship that changes the journey getting there. Try it. Make yourself available. It may seem awkward at first, but that's ok. The benefits of your perseverance will be absolutely amazing!
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